Wednesday, March 26, 2008



let's see. what can happen in under 30 days, you ask? well, i'll tell ya:

1. my roommate left. which is fine. it's great actually. she nearly killed stavros, she nearly killed herself, and subsequently i nearly killed her. remember that horrible movie starring mark paul "zack morris" gosselaar - dead man on campus? the one where he tries to find a roommate 'on the verge' of suicide so as to cement an a for the semester? yeah, well, point: my roommate nearly got shoved off the fire escape.

but she left. she and her weird co-dependent boyfriend moved out. which means:

2. stavros is ok. dear people: cats do not drink vodka. cats do not drink vodka nor do they get their own bean and cheese burrito, no matter how small you make it. my poor cat. he'll never be able to see a taco bell or chilis commercial without twitching slightly. seriously, no vodka people. NO VODKA FOR THE KITTIES.

3. i already have a new roommate: the fabulastic kim kennedy. i know! amazing! and fun! and trouble! but what, you may be asking, happened to kim's other living situation? the one in brooklyn? with her super cute roommate? the one who seemed to have a certain special love for kim?

after approximately 8 months of breakfasts in bed and snuggles on the couch, captain romanti-roommate turned into lieutenant douchebag. so my evil roommate did her vodka/stavros routine the same week that kim's roomtard explained to her that while they'd been having a lovely affair for nearly a year - and living together in what seemed to be domestic tranquility - that they were in fact just roommates and he would be bringing home girls whenever he felt like it. the implication being that when he didn't feel like it, he'd expect his side of kim's bed available to him.

so kim moved in. i mean, sure the apartment's a bit smaller than her old one, but she's now kicking it east village style. yay kim! it's very exciting. i now have someone to share my tv watching fully with.

also, she's got almost as many flip flops as i do.

also, she loves the yankees like a junkie loves drugs.

also, she's obsessively clean like i am. for example: i cleaned her room like crazy after crazy-town moved out [the day before kim moved in]. when kim got to the apartment, we moved all her boxes in and then she cleaned the room again! was i offended? nope. she just wanted to clean again. this place is going to be sparkling. this will most likely offend stavros, because he enjoys a good dust ball/toy as much as the next guy. he's going to have to learn to love the balls-with-bells that santa gave him in his stocking.

4. kim switched jobs. so this move is good because now that we're at different companies, we'll still see each other every day as roommates. HOORAY.

i will write about the new season of the bachelor [london calling] and another crop of 25 year old events planners looking for faux love, rock of love: 2, and high school reunion at a later date.


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