why we're all idiots when it comes to love.

i blame hollywood.

easy to say, right? but i've been watching terrible romantic comedies [the next person who calls it a romcom gets hit with a sock filled with pennies] all night on tbs, and quite frankly, hollywood is to blame. take serendipity starring john cusack and kate beckinsale. at what point is this movie at all believable? so far for me, and granted i've eaten nearly an entire box of cereal without milk this evening, the best parts of this dreck have been jeremy piven being his usually malignant delightful self and my pre-teen obsession with john cusack - a man who makes wearing eyeliner an everyday occurrence.

i'm rambling, i know. but i'm in a bit of a kerfuffle on this: of COURSE we're all morons and unrealistic in our relationships! of course people sleep together at the first sign of attraction and then wake up 3 weeks later and realize 'my god. what is in bed next to me? this person offends me on 17 different levels. i've made a terrible mistake.' movies like serendipity teach us, essentially, that all you need to do is be in the right place at the right time and BAM! you'll be matched up cosmically with your soul mate. and if you're not, if you happen to be in a relationship with a perfectly nice person, well when your soul mate DOES pop up [and you know they will and you know you'll know it because you just will. plus, mood music] you'll be able to extricate yourself from the current relationship with little to no fuss. because while there might be tears, there will be no guilt on your part. and your significant other will just fade away. it's picture perfect, really.

i'm being redundant, but it's unrealistic.

the manager at the bookstore i worked at during high school was unrealistic. she'd been married to her husband for 15 years and complained to me that the relationship was over because the passion and spark were gone. granted, that sucks, but she couldn't recognize that relationships grow and evolve into things that don't involve getting slammed into stacks of books in the store room during inventory by the 19 year old delivery van driver. which she wanted. and she did. during breaks. not just inventory.

which ended my ever going into the store room again.

my point is: hollywood has been training us to be unrealistic. so that we continue searching for that soul mate, that perfect person that only exists on the silver screen. my theory is that john cusack does NOT say the perfect thing all the time. he doesn't stutter adorably when he's nervous. he does not always wear a soft t-shirt and blazer and look amazingly natural in his eye liner. i think he can often be found in sweatpants and smelling faintly of gin. i bet he farts and picks at his feet while watching man vs. nature. and he's the john cusack i'm interested in. no need for a boombox.

comment. let's open a dialogue on what love really is all about - because i certainly haven't a clue and i think i'm supremely bad at it. i'd hate to think that what the father character in the wedding date is true, that every woman has the love life she truly wants. that would blow. on so many levels. [i can not believe i'm posting paraphrases from the bloody wedding date.]

but listen, i may not respond right away. i'm throwing in the towel and watching reruns of soap operas on soapnet. at least they're honest in their sham.